For your amusement, here are some of the things Thai people have said to me:

“Why don’t you cut your toenails more often?”

“It seems like you’re fatter.” (This accompanied by hand motions which seemed to indicate that my face had swollen up like a balloon.)

“Have you been eating a lot lately?”

“You don’t speak Thai well at all.” (Thankfully, lately people have been complimenting me on my Thai almost every day. But for awhile this was very discouraging.)

[neighbor] “Sara! Where are you?”
[me] (washing my face before bed) “In the bathroom!”
[neighbor] (waits for me to emerge) “Oh, were you showering?”
[me] (thinking “to shower” might be a general term for washing in general) “yes.”
[neighbor] (looking into my bathroom) “You didn’t use much water…. you didn’t shower!” (accusatory, for Thais shower at least twice a day, religiously). “Why not, because it’s cold?”
[me] “Yes, and because in the States people only shower once a day.”
[neighbor] “But it’s not hot there. You need to shower twice a day. In the morning and when you get home in the evening.”
–Since then she has been watching to see if shower in the evening and will often ask me about it. I’m considering sucking it up and showering twice a day so I make a little more sense in her eyes.

“How much did you pay for your haircut?” “How much did it cost you to fly here?” “How much did that shirt cost?” “How much do you spend on food every day?” (Followed by very blunt opinions, almost always– “too expensive.”)

“Don’t eat too much food or when you go home your friends will tell you how fat you got in Thailand.”

“Narak jung luuy!” (or “So cute!”)– yelled at me by random people on the street.

“You’re 23?! I thought you were about 16!”

“Your skin is so white and beautiful. You have such pretty blonde hair. Thai people aren’t pretty at all– we all have black eyes and black skin.”

(in broken English) “Hellooooooo! Hey you! Farang! (foreigner)”

“Hello! I don’t have a girlfriend yet!”